Meet the Leaf Counting Guy, henceforth referred to as "Assface". Assface is a blogger, and like many bloggers out there, should not be a blogger. Here are Assface's crimes against humanity:
He places importance on political events. Taken verbatim from Assface's blog:
"Does anybody else find it sad that blogs across the land are in a frenzied buzz talking about Kathy Sierra, but don’t even know the names of 14 British soldiers being held in Iran?"
Sorry Assface, but I don't. You know why? Nobody gives a shit about political events. Everyone already knows my stance on politics, at least the humor associated with it. Personally, I think the alternative is retarded too, so everyone loses.
His sense of humor is a reflection of the comedic trend that's ruining America. If you know my buddy Violent Acres, you'd know she recently announced that she wants people to come up with catchphrases for her site. Here's Assface's suggestion:
"I’ll fuck you faster than a lizard rapes a duck in the mouth"
When I read that I died a little inside. Is this what humor today is coming to? Do people read this bullshit and LOL themselves silly?
Sadly, they do. Random is funny! WHAT COULD BE FUNNIER THAN A LIZARD ORALLY VIOLATING A WATER FOWL? I'll tell you what: anything. I don't know about the rest of you out there, but I'm sick to death of random comedy. Monopolizing on this trend is Adult Swim, and most of their shows are fucking tripe. It's a milkshake with a fucking machine gun, time to laugh our asses off!
My point is that any dipshit can think of something random and get a laugh for it. I may not be much better for making dick jokes, but it's better than what Assface over there is shitting out.
